I hope you’ll all follow me there!

http://www.sinternet.com/newmusic30.php

I love the song! She’ll perform it this Sunday at the VMAs.

Lindsay Lohan loses her paternal grandfather and lashes out at her daddy, Michael Lohan, on her blog. Michael has publicly criticized Lindsay’s relationship with DJ Samantha Ronson, calling it “toxic”, and claiming Ronson is using her to write a tell-all book. Right, if there’s anyone exploiting Lindsay it’s you and her pathetic excuse for a mother.

So…David Duchovny’s a sex addict. And he’s entered rehab. Sounds like he’s one of those method actors and got too into his character on Showtime’s Californication. David used to be so sexy during his X-Files days.  What in the world happened?

Aaron Sorkin plans on creating a film based on Facebook. Just when I was losing faith in humanity, something comes along and lifts me right up. This will be one for the history books. Whatev, I’ll still be updating my status and changing my profile pic daily.

Michael Jackson turns 50. And he says he “feels young”. Are you sure that’s his age and not just the number of new noses he’s gotten glued to the middle of his face?  Age doesn’t matter when you use plastic surgery like it’s Advil.

My idol Alan Ball is getting slammed for the title of his directorial feature debut, Towelhead.  Ball uses him being at the receiving end of anti-gay language to defend the title of the film.  Regardless of the controversy surrounding it, I will be seeing it ASAP.

There’s a John Lennon biopic in the works called Nowhere Boy, directed by Sam Taylor-Wood.  The script “details the story of Lennon as a lonely teenager growing up as his aunt and the mother who gave him up fight for his love. His only escape is music, art and his fateful friendship with Paul McCartney.”

Heroes star Milo Ventimiglia talked to the Advocate in an interview about his big gay following, and in it he described an interaction with Perez Hilton in which he made quite an unusual request.

“I met Perez Hilton when I was at a Super Bowl party in Miami with a bunch of my agents. He walked past me, and I stopped him and said, ‘Excuse me. Hey, my name is Milo.’ And he’s like, ‘Yeah. Hi.’ I said, ‘Hey, man, I’ve checked out your site a handful of times, and you do some pretty cool stuff on there. You gotta do me a favor: Next time you post a picture of me, just put tons of come on my face. Tons. I mean, load it up.’”

Of course, everyone’s favorite fat, greasy homo was more than happy to oblige.

Looking and sounding gorgeous as always.

Yes, yes, I know. It’s blasphemous. The next time I walk into a black gay club I’m probably going to be bound, gagged, and thrown in front of a speeding bus. But upon listening to Solange Knowles’ new album Sol-Angel and the Hadley St. Dreams, I find myself quite impressed. It’s a 60s and 70s inspired concept album bleeding with Doo-Wop harmonies, and boogie-woogie piano chords. As the title suggests, Solange is heavily influenced by old Motown girl groups such as the Supremes and the Marvellettes. Her music isn’t as slick or as catchy as any of their tunes, but it’s just as fun.

Now don’t get me wrong. Before you flood my inbox with hate mail (the last time I addressed Beyonce I got some messages that made me afraid to leave the house), I’m well aware that Little Knowles lacks the vocal prowess of her older sister. Solange trying to belt out a power ballad like Listen would probably sound like a chorus of stray cats trying to scream while being strangled. But the thing is, if Solange were to tackle the cheesy, faux-empowerment tune, I’d believe it a lot more. The reason I think she’s better than her sister is that with this album, she comes across as genuine. I see her as a real artist, someone who’s actually looking to make something credible rather than get a cheap hit (though considering she wrote Beyonce’s Get Me Bodied, she’s obviously capable of coming up with such things).

With a name like hers, she could have easily gone after Timbaland, Danja, and the like. With enough promotion and payola she could’ve scored herself at least a top 10 hit, and probably gone gold within a few months. But she actually had an artistic vision, and she followed through. Recruiting producers like the Freemasons, Cee-Lo Green of Gnarls Barkley, and Mark Ronson, she went after people who she thought would get her vision. And they weren’t easily convinced. At first she wasn’t even able to get them to call her back. Cee-Lo Green for instance, she had to hunt him down at a party and give her some of her music to listen to. Once he did, he signed on immediately. Her artistic vision follows through to her music videos which she directs herself, and are full of color and creativity.

Is this album as brilliant as say, Amy Winehouse’s Back to Black? No. Solange hasn’t experienced the heartache necessary to create something so authentic. Is it as varied, fun, and dramatic as Christina Aguilera’s Back to Basics? Nada. But I dare to say Sol-Angel and the Hadley St. Dreams is leaps and bounds above both of Beyonce’s bland pop albums both lyrically and musically. And I think if the cards were dealt differently, and Solange had been first born, the tables would be turned. But alas, her status as the underdog, the anti-Beyonce if you will, may be part of her appeal. Unfortunately, considering neither of her first two singles have made an indenture on any radio format, it’s likely her album will be in bargain bins very soon, along with Kelly Rowland’s first two LPs.

You betta sang, gerl!

Cute. For those interested, Christina’s doing a signing for those who buy her new fragrance at Macy’s Herald Square on September 2. You have to be one of the first 200 to buy it when it’s released on August 31.

Academy Award winning diva Jennifer Hudson will sing the Star Spangled Banner on Thursday night when Obama accepts his nomination at the Democratic National Convention.  You betta work, J-Hud!

Diddy’s entourage was pulled over by an L.A. Deputy for expired tags, and ended up having the officer pull a gun on them.  Clearly the officer was having a bad case of bitch-ass-ness.

Reportedly, Cher has been tapped to play Catwoman in the next installment of Christopher Nolan’s Batman franchise.  I suppose it’s better than Halle Berry but no one will outdo Michelle Pfeiffer.

The critics are not being kind to Don Cheadle’s new action thriller Traitor.  The film is supposed to be centered around the huge plot twist that Cheadle’s character is in fact a double agent.  Unfortunately, the title lets that cat out of the bag before we even buy a ticket.

Four men have been arrested in an alleged Obama assassination plot.  They reportedly planned to shoot him during his acceptance speech Thursday night.  God bless America.

Does it bother you when you’re watching Sex & The City on TBS and it seems more like you’re watching Zoey 101?  Or how about Queer As Folk on Logo, edited like it belongs on ABC Family?  Entertainment Weekly takes on bad TV editing.

Wanna see Johnny Depp sing live in concert?  Here’s your chance.  Of course, if you’re anything like me, you’ll need to pack a roll of paper towels and a fresh pair of undies to change into.

Remember a while back when Teri Hatcher revealed in Vanity Fair that she’d been molested by her uncle?  Well apparently the man, whom she helped get convicted and sent to prison, has died.  Normally I’d say rest in peace, but….

Christina, Beyonce, Britney, are supposedly all slated to release new albums this fall. Clearly the chicken coop is about to get even more crowded. Here’s the scoop on Kelly Clarkson’s fourth LP:

Ryan Tedder of OneRepublic recently spoke with ABC News Radio, and here’s what he had to say about Kelly Clarkson’s upcoming CD, due to drop in November:

OneRepublic’s Ryan Tedder did quite a bit of work on Kelly Clarkson’s forthcoming CD, and when asked to describe it, Tedder told ABC News Radio, “The sound is, in a word, amazing.” He added, “She was talking about how she thinks it’ll be better than any album she’s put out so far. The last song we did [together] is my favorite song I’ve done since ‘Apologize’ or ‘Bleeding Love’ or whatever. It’s very haunting.” Tedder raves, “I’ve never been more excited about material that I’ve worked on with any artist, to be quite frank.”

Saying the sound of the record is “all over the place,” Tedder explains, ‘She’s gonna have really aggressive, in-your-face rock/pop, but she’s also gonna have orchestral, Mozart moments of classical rhythmic stuff. It’s great.”

Sounds good in theory. But I’m afraid this could turn out to be another My December. Hope I’m wrong.

Okay, I admit it.  Though Nickelodeon has gone to shit and hasn’t had a decent line up since the late 90s, from time to time I do indulge in the silly but lovable Drake & Josh (R.I.P.).  The little sister’s annoying as hell, yet somehow quite accurate, and who can’t help but love the newfound slim Josh Peck and his outrageous brand of physical comedy?

Anyway, though the show’s unfortunately no longer on, the cast is reuniting for a Christmas movie that will air this Winter on Nickelodeon.  Drake Bell talked about it in an interview at the Teen Choice Awards:

Drake: We actually started production last Wednesday and it’s “Merry Christmas Drake and Josh” and it’s going to be airing in December. It’s awesome. We’ve been done (with the show) for two and a half years so to actually be back together with everyone is like a high school or family reunion.

Sadly, I can’t wait. Upon further investigation I realized there’s actually yet another Drake & Josh movie in production, this one called Drake & Josh In New York! It looks like this one is set for a theatrical release rather than being aired on TV. Maybe I’ll take my seven year old cousin and pretend she dragged me there against my will.

Last May when Desperate Housewives aired its season finale and Katherine Mayfair’s secret was finally revealed, it wasn’t the fact that the Dylan we thought was the real Dylan wasn’t actually her daughter that shocked us. It was the last five minutes of the program which revealed the show was jumping five years into the future. We saw a more mature and hard-looking Bree Hodge, now a high-powered business woman a la Martha Stewart, a disheveled Gabrielle Solis, now a new mother losing her mind a la Lynette from season one, a Lynette Scavo who has visibly gotten rid of her wigs and scarves but might be pulling her hair out soon–dealing with two rebellious teenage boys, and most shocking of all, Susan Mayer kissing a sexy-as-ever Gale Harold (Queer As Folk), not Mike Delfino.

Many have asked, “well how will we know what’s happened in those five years?” My answer to that question is, how do we know what happened before the very first episode of Desperate Housewives? We learned what happened through flashbacks, back story, storylines that revealed their past secrets and the framework of their characters. People don’t seem to get that this is really in essence, a reboot of the show–and of the characters. Writer Jeff Greenstein (”In Buddy’s Eyes”, “Free”) said, “You’ll see some flashbacks. Occasionally there will be some things you’ve missed that we’ll have to explain. There’s going to be some things you’ve missed that we’re not going to explain so quickly. [However,] we’re not doing Lost. We’re not slaves to flashbacks.” Others have asked, “what happened to Mike and Susan? I need to know now!” My response is, why? When Mike first came to Wisteria Lane, we had no idea why he was there. Just as we had no idea why Mary Alice had killed herself. The fun is in finding out the “why”. So just be patient and enjoy the ride.

Greenstein says that the writers are wiping the slate clean. That the stories had become so convoluted–jumping ahead five years will allow them to get Desperate Housewives back to a more simple, relatable level. “We found that after four years in, we were looking to portray those predicaments once again. We didn’t want to have to wait to show Gabrielle with children, or Bree in a thriving business, so we figured let’s just jump ahead and do it. … Let’s see what Lynette is like with two 16-year-olds at home. That was something we didn’t want to have to wait until season ten to start exploring.”

I for one, am ecstatic about the change, and I’m excited to see what has changed on Wisteria Lane, not just for our four main housewives, but for Edie Britt and Katharine Mayfair as well. Last season Edie was cast out from the group for threatening to expose Bree’s pregnancy as a hoax. After which, she skipped town. But Edie is now back with a new hot husband (played by Neal McDonough), and stirring up trouble. As for Katherine, we know at the end of season four, she and Bree had opened up a catering business. Unfortunately for Katherine, Bree is the one who has become the big star, while she is behind the scenes “doing all the work” (the words of actress Dana Delaney herself).

The official promo for the series premiered online a few days ago, along with some juicy scenes from the upcoming season. I personally love the one line zingers such as when Edie questions Gaby about her new fat house frou appearance and she says, “I had two kids.” Edie’s response is, “For what, breakfast?” Then there’s Edie revealing to everyone that she has a new husband. Susan, being her arch rival, asks, “Oh really? Whose?” And this is why I love this show. The promo is a bit lacking when compared to previous seasons, especially the one for season four shot by David LaChappelle.

The season four DVD comes out on September 2, and the season five premiere airs on September 28. I’m setting my Tivo as I type. How about you? Below is the behind the scenes look at season five, the official promo, and a brief interview with the show’s creator Marc Cherry.

Ben Stiller’s Tropic Thunder stomped on the competition again in its second weekend, beating out the respectable opening weekend of the Anna Faris/Katharine McPhee comedy House Bunny.

Yes, I was dragged by my seven year old cousin to see Wall-E. No, I’m not proud of it. Kate Bornstein lays out the case for Wall-E actually possibly being a gay love story.

Oops…she did it again. No, not Britney. Madonna. In yet another ploy for attention Madonna rips John McCain in an onstage montage, comparing him to Hitler.

Tune into The Black List, a collection of interviews with African-American luminaries tonight at 9 PM on HBO. The program will include Secretary of State Collin Powell, actor Laurence Fishburne, author Toni Morrison, among others. Unfortunately I’m too broke to afford HBO, so I’ll wait ’til it’s on DVD.

Due to the success of Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, the next Superman film is said to be getting rebooted so that it can emulate the dark tone of the critically acclaimed Christopher Nolan films. I’m sorry, but after how horrible Superman Returns was I honestly can’t see myself shelling out another $11.15 to sit through Hot Mess #2. Get back to X-Men, Bryan Singer.

Tufts University claims they have evidence that Gaydar is in fact real. Of course it’s real. How else would Justin Timberlake and JC Chasez be able to find each other in a dark room?

Click the image to see the full e-mail. 

Additionally, one of Christina’s most loyal dancers Gilbert Salvidar, has sent messages to some fans on MySpace confirming Christina is releasing a new track very soon.

If this is true, great news! Can’t wait to hear what she’s been cookin’ up in the studio.

Eh, the video’s cute (mostly because of the gorgeous Carey Hart) but the song honestly makes me physically ill. I wish she’d stop trying so hard to come across as a tough rocker chick with attitude.

Her new album titled Funhouse is set for release in late October. If it’s anywhere near as good as I’m Not Dead, I’m definitely picking it up.

Jennifer Garner is shocked by the death of A-List make-up artist Paul Starr, who died in his Los Angeles home on Monday night. She says, “It’s a horrible shock to me. He was such a warm, kind, wonderful man.”

Brian McFadden of the 90s boyband Westlife, has offended many in the gay community with his remarks about straight men not wearing pink. I love it when has-beens come out of nowhere to say something stupid.

Desperate Housewives star Felicity Huffman is impressed by her new personal trainer who actually tells her to eat more! Her previous personal trainer wanted to keep her below 125 lbs. Sheesh!

I have bad news ladies and gentleman. Senator John McSame (as Bush) has cut Barack Obama’s lead in the presidential race in half, according to the most recent New York Times poll.

Yet another boy band member to come out of the closet? New Kids on The Block singer Jonathan Knight is reportedly a closeted homo.  A source reveals, “Knight has a [non-famous] boyfriend and they’re very happy.”

Ultimate fag hag Margaret Cho returns to the small screen tonight on Vh1 with her own reality show a la Kathy Griffin’s My Life on the D-List.  The last time we saw Cho on TV was in the 90s with her failed sitcom All American Girl.

What good sports.  Even though none of the Desperate Housewives were nominated this year, (including the fabulous Dana Delany who if I must say myself, was robbed!) all six ladies of Wisteria Lane will present together at this year’s Emmy Awards ceremony.  Y’all better look fierce.

So…can anyone explain to me why exactly L’oreal lightened Beyonce’s skin on their most recent ad in Elle magazine?  Anybody?

This isn’t the first time Beyonce’s skin has been lightened for a magazine.  She appeared on Vanity Fair back in 2005 and many people were upset that it appeared her skin had been lightened then.  Vanity Fair responded by saying they were just trying to make her skin color fit with the new color scheme of the magazine.

…Right.  And I bet if your color scheme was darker, you never would have dared to darken a white person’s skin to make it fit with the color scheme of the magazine.

Beyonce has yet to comment on this skin-lightening mess, and I doubt she ever will.  We all know at the age of 26, she still depends on Mommy and Daddy to do all of her dirty work.

The divas of Wisteria Lane will be returning to the small screen on the 28th of September, and as you all know if you’ve watched last season’s finale, the show will jump five years into the future.  Bree is running a huge business a la Martha Stewart (which of course, her rival Katherine Mayfair is not happy with), Lynette is now dealing with rebellious teenage boys, Gabrielle is a homely mother of two, and Susan has a new man–Gale Harold!

We have to tune in to find out how all these ladies have been faring for the past five years on Wisteria Lane.

If you want to catch up on Season Four, the DVD is released September 2.

Dakota Fanning, Queen Latifah, and Alicia Keys star in what looks to be a great film. Little Dakota is growing up! lol @ Jennifer Hudson’s tiny little part no one will remember at the end of the movie. I’m starting to lose faith in her acting skills post-Dreamgirls