Senator John McCain has chosen Sarah Palin, Governor of Alaska, to be his Vice Presidential candidate. Call me crazy but I smell cheap pandering. Hillary supporters, don’t fall for this mess!

Lindsay Lohan loses her paternal grandfather and lashes out at her daddy, Michael Lohan, on her blog. Michael has publicly criticized Lindsay’s relationship with DJ Samantha Ronson, calling it “toxic”, and claiming Ronson is using her to write a tell-all book. Right, if there’s anyone exploiting Lindsay it’s you and her pathetic excuse for a mother.

So…David Duchovny’s a sex addict. And he’s entered rehab. Sounds like he’s one of those method actors and got too into his character on Showtime’s Californication. David used to be so sexy during his X-Files days.  What in the world happened?

Aaron Sorkin plans on creating a film based on Facebook. Just when I was losing faith in humanity, something comes along and lifts me right up. This will be one for the history books. Whatev, I’ll still be updating my status and changing my profile pic daily.

Michael Jackson turns 50. And he says he “feels young”. Are you sure that’s his age and not just the number of new noses he’s gotten glued to the middle of his face?  Age doesn’t matter when you use plastic surgery like it’s Advil.

My idol Alan Ball is getting slammed for the title of his directorial feature debut, Towelhead.  Ball uses him being at the receiving end of anti-gay language to defend the title of the film.  Regardless of the controversy surrounding it, I will be seeing it ASAP.

There’s a John Lennon biopic in the works called Nowhere Boy, directed by Sam Taylor-Wood.  The script “details the story of Lennon as a lonely teenager growing up as his aunt and the mother who gave him up fight for his love. His only escape is music, art and his fateful friendship with Paul McCartney.”

Academy Award winning diva Jennifer Hudson will sing the Star Spangled Banner on Thursday night when Obama accepts his nomination at the Democratic National Convention.  You betta work, J-Hud!

Diddy’s entourage was pulled over by an L.A. Deputy for expired tags, and ended up having the officer pull a gun on them.  Clearly the officer was having a bad case of bitch-ass-ness.

Reportedly, Cher has been tapped to play Catwoman in the next installment of Christopher Nolan’s Batman franchise.  I suppose it’s better than Halle Berry but no one will outdo Michelle Pfeiffer.

The critics are not being kind to Don Cheadle’s new action thriller Traitor.  The film is supposed to be centered around the huge plot twist that Cheadle’s character is in fact a double agent.  Unfortunately, the title lets that cat out of the bag before we even buy a ticket.

Four men have been arrested in an alleged Obama assassination plot.  They reportedly planned to shoot him during his acceptance speech Thursday night.  God bless America.

Does it bother you when you’re watching Sex & The City on TBS and it seems more like you’re watching Zoey 101?  Or how about Queer As Folk on Logo, edited like it belongs on ABC Family?  Entertainment Weekly takes on bad TV editing.

Wanna see Johnny Depp sing live in concert?  Here’s your chance.  Of course, if you’re anything like me, you’ll need to pack a roll of paper towels and a fresh pair of undies to change into.

Remember a while back when Teri Hatcher revealed in Vanity Fair that she’d been molested by her uncle?  Well apparently the man, whom she helped get convicted and sent to prison, has died.  Normally I’d say rest in peace, but….

Okay, I admit it.  Though Nickelodeon has gone to shit and hasn’t had a decent line up since the late 90s, from time to time I do indulge in the silly but lovable Drake & Josh (R.I.P.).  The little sister’s annoying as hell, yet somehow quite accurate, and who can’t help but love the newfound slim Josh Peck and his outrageous brand of physical comedy?

Anyway, though the show’s unfortunately no longer on, the cast is reuniting for a Christmas movie that will air this Winter on Nickelodeon.  Drake Bell talked about it in an interview at the Teen Choice Awards:

Drake: We actually started production last Wednesday and it’s “Merry Christmas Drake and Josh” and it’s going to be airing in December. It’s awesome. We’ve been done (with the show) for two and a half years so to actually be back together with everyone is like a high school or family reunion.

Sadly, I can’t wait. Upon further investigation I realized there’s actually yet another Drake & Josh movie in production, this one called Drake & Josh In New York! It looks like this one is set for a theatrical release rather than being aired on TV. Maybe I’ll take my seven year old cousin and pretend she dragged me there against my will.

Songwriter Kara DioGuardi (Kelly Clarkson, Christina Aguilera, etc.) has been added as a fourth judge on American Idol. Hm, does this mean they’re inching closer to finally replacing Paula?

Ben Stiller’s Tropic Thunder stomped on the competition again in its second weekend, beating out the respectable opening weekend of the Anna Faris/Katharine McPhee comedy House Bunny.

Yes, I was dragged by my seven year old cousin to see Wall-E. No, I’m not proud of it. Kate Bornstein lays out the case for Wall-E actually possibly being a gay love story.

Oops…she did it again. No, not Britney. Madonna. In yet another ploy for attention Madonna rips John McCain in an onstage montage, comparing him to Hitler.

Tune into The Black List, a collection of interviews with African-American luminaries tonight at 9 PM on HBO. The program will include Secretary of State Collin Powell, actor Laurence Fishburne, author Toni Morrison, among others. Unfortunately I’m too broke to afford HBO, so I’ll wait ’til it’s on DVD.

Due to the success of Batman Begins and The Dark Knight, the next Superman film is said to be getting rebooted so that it can emulate the dark tone of the critically acclaimed Christopher Nolan films. I’m sorry, but after how horrible Superman Returns was I honestly can’t see myself shelling out another $11.15 to sit through Hot Mess #2. Get back to X-Men, Bryan Singer.

Tufts University claims they have evidence that Gaydar is in fact real. Of course it’s real. How else would Justin Timberlake and JC Chasez be able to find each other in a dark room?

Dakota Fanning, Queen Latifah, and Alicia Keys star in what looks to be a great film. Little Dakota is growing up! lol @ Jennifer Hudson’s tiny little part no one will remember at the end of the movie. I’m starting to lose faith in her acting skills post-Dreamgirls

Barack Obama takes a break from campaigning and gets caught shirtless on the beach getting his surf on. Yikes, tan lines!

The family of slain teenager Lawrence King are placing blame on King’s school for allowing him to wear make-up and girls clothing to school–factors that allegedly lead to his murder. Huh? You’re his parents.

The perpetual hot mess that is Britney Spears, nominated for three awards, may perform at this year’s MTV Video Music Awards. Is this finally gonna be her comeback?

Daytime darling Ellen DeGeneres finally married her longtime girlfriend Portia de Rossi this weekend in Los Angeles. Congrats, ladies! Now it’s Oprah and Gayle’s turn.

Shia LaBeouf has headed back to work after crushing his hand in an auto-accident last month that was apparently not his fault. He’s filming scenes for the upcoming sequel to Transformers.

Here’s a quite awkward interview American Idol runner-up Katharine McPhee did with Newsweek to promote her upcoming film House Bunny. Clearly someone didn’t do their research before the interview.

Sony Pictures is doing a remake of the campy but creepy 90s film Candyman starring Tony Todd and Virgina Madsen. Looking back I laugh, but at the time that movie made me piss my little pants.

Justin Timberlake sports a speedo and pornstache for his new film The Love Guru with Mike Myers, which comes out this summer. Hm, that package looks questionable.

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So excited!

On Getting Naked In The Next Bond:
“I’d go totally nude. I’ve got nothing to hide, and after all, we ask the girls to reveal almost all, so why not the men?”

On His Famous Blue Trunks Scene:
“Did I know the trunk thing would be such a big deal? Yeah. I saw it on a huge billboard in Hollywood and people were screaming. It did make me feel rather nervous.”

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Yes, Daniel! More nude men please.