No, but seriously. It’s a new pic of John Travolta as Edna Turnblad in the new Hairspray movie. Either that or Rosie O’Donnell decided to go back to being a lipstick lesbian.

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Okay everyone. This is going to be a MEGA post, so bear with me.

Three-time Oscar nominated actress (and the bitchin-ess Catwoman ever) Michelle Pfeiffer is slated to star as the villain in the highly publicized and anticipated screen version of Broadway musical Hairspray. Pfeiffer joins an all-star cast that includes Oscar nominees Queen Latifah and John Travolta, as well as teen star Amanda Bynes.

The film will start filming on Sept. 5, and will most likely be released in December of 2007.

In other Broadway news, Grammy winner R&B star Usher will join the cast of Chicago for his Broadway debut starting August 22–lasting through early October. He’ll be playing conniving lawyer Billy Flynn (the role played by Richard Gere in the movie).

He says:

“I have always admired Broadway actors for their showmanship, dedication and focus that goes into performing live on stage every night. Being on Broadway allows you to connect to audiences in a whole new way that’s different from music and movies.”

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With syndication rights already bought up for ABC’s hit Desperate Housewives, the network should be grinning from ear to ear now that its other hit Grey’s Anatomy will be giving shared syndication rights to both TNT and the Oxygen network. TNT has the rights to play the show during the day, while Oxygen is given the post-6 PM slot.

Rumor has it Oxygen paid about 700,000 per episode of Emmy nominee and Golden Globe winner Grey’s Anatomy while TNT paid about 300,000 to foot the rest of the million dollar bill. The episodes should begin airing in about 2009, when the show is in its fifth season.

In other Grey’s Anatomy news, star Kate Walsh is teaming up with Golden Globe nominee John Cusack in a new adaptation of Stephen King novel 1408. The film also stars Oscar nominee Samuel L. Jackson.

It starts filming before the end of the summer in the U.K.

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Disney channel That’s So Raven star Raven Symone has signed on to remake the 80s classic Adventures In Babysitting. The original, which opened in 1987, starred Elisabeth Shue, Vincent D’Onofrio, Bradley Whitford, and Anthony Rapp.

There is no information as to when the film will start production, as it’s only at the script stage.

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Oscar winner Holly Hunter is in negotiations to star in a new TNT drama series Saving Grace, while Golden Globe nominee Michael Keaton will star in the six-hour mini-series The Company.

According to Hollywood Reporter:

In “Grace,” Hunter will star as a jaded police officer who is offered the chance to redeem her life after she encounters an angel. Signing on to the project would give Hunter her first TV series role.

Also, The Practice star Lara Flynn Boyle is starring in the original movie The House Next Door (I’m laughing too), and Desperate Housewives star Jay Harrington is in a new movie with Scrubs beauty Sarah Chalke called Why I Wore Lipstick To My Mastectomy.

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Actress Regina King (who should’ve been thrown an Oscar nod for Ray) will be featured in episodes of FOX drama 24. She will join as a heretofore unseen Palmer sister Angela, a powerful lawyer with an advocacy group.

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For those of you pining for some heat over on Wisteria Lane, season one’s hot gardener and John Tucker Must Die star Jesse Metcalfe says it’s possible he will return to the show that launched his career, Desperate Housewives. The red hot actor says:

“I’ve been very selective and I’ve turned down half a dozen things,” he said. “Some things came right away after I was done shooting. I came back into town and shot a few episodes of ‘Housewives‘. There’s been some talk of me coming back for a third season. I’m weighing that out.”

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I’m not sure about everyone else, but I really, really hate Perez Hilton (or whatever his real name is). Though his site is fun to read sometimes, other times it makes me sick that someone like him sits atop gay blogging and online gossip. His taste in music and movies is that of a 13 year old girl, he spends his life ragging on every celebrity he can think of but then professing his “love” for them, and a few weeks ago he had the nerve to seriously call Mariska Hargitay and her husband Peter Hermann C-List celebrities (which of course prompted hundreds of angry comments defending the Golden Globe winner).

The self-proclaimed “Queen of the Media” is yet another bad example of male homosexuality at its worst. According to Perez, the more beautiful you are the more famous you should be, the more famous you are the more so awesomely fabulous you are, girl!! Welcome to Bulimia Lane. Now that that rant has run its course, here’s a picture of the culprit with Full House stars Bob Saget and John Stamos to promote a performance John is having with the Beach Boys.

Of course, John looks so adorable in the picture–but what’s up with Bob Saget? Should I be handing him a bottle of Maalox or a voucher for the nearest rehab facility?

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And as for Dave Navarro and Tommy Lee’s exchange of DNA at the recent Rock Star: Supernova promotional party–I’m personally aroused and disgusted all at the same time. I guess that’s their charm.

There’s a nationwide search on for an actress to play the lead in Hairspray, the musical remake of the cult film, but the best friend has been found.

Daily Variety reports Amanda Bynes has been signed up to play Penny Pingleton, best friend of central character Tracy Turnblad in the musical. John Travolta and Queen Latifah are already on board.

Adam Shankman is set to direct the film, as well as choreograph it. Craig Zadan and Neil Meron are producing.

The filmmakers better find their dream Tracy soon, though, rehearsals for Hairspray are scheduled to begin this summer, and the film is already set to be released in the summer 2007 movie season.

The Academy Awards are tonight at 8 on ABC, hosted by Jon Stewart. Here are a few pictures from the rehearsal they had yesterday for the presenters. Keep coming back during tonight’s Oscars, I’ll be blogging live with updates on who’s winning what and what I think about what bitches are wearing. I’ll scourge the earth for the best pictures I can find of these nasty bitches–hopefully nobody pulls a Teri Hatcher. We’ll see if my predictions for this year’s 78th Annual Academy Awards turn out to be right.

John Travolta

Jack Nicholson

Uma Thurman

Ziyi Zhang Opening Envelope

Will Smith

Hilary Swank

He was the teenage prince of disco in “Saturday Night Fever,” the dreamy leader of a high school gang in “Grease” and a mob hit man in “Pulp Fiction.” Now John Travolta will be playing a mom.

The 52-year-old actor has been cast as Edna Turnblad, the mother of an aspiring teenage dancer, in an upcoming feature film adaptation of the Broadway hit musical “Hairspray,” which was based on the 1988 cult movie of the same name, distributor New Line Cinema said on Friday.

In the original movie by director John Waters, the part of Edna was played by the late transvestite performer Divine. Stage and screen actor Harvey Fierstein won a Tony Award for the role on Broadway.

New Line also announced that singer-actress Queen Latifah, who earned an Oscar nomination for her performance in the 2002 movie musical “Chicago,” would play the character Motormouth Maybelle in the new “Hairspray” film.

Production on the film is set to begin this fall for a potential summer 2007 release, according to New Line, a unit of Time Warner Inc.

The project reunites Latifah, 35, with the producers behind “Chicago,” Craig Zadan and Neil Meron, as well as with director Adam Shankman, who worked with her on “Bringing Down the House.”

The story of “Hairspray” centers on “pleasantly plump” teenager Tracy Turnblad as she pursues her dream of landing a spot on a local TV show in Baltimore during the early 1960s, and uses her newfound fame to press for racial integration.

Ricki Lake starred as Tracy in the original film, which also featured Sonny Bono, Deborah Harry and Jerry Stiller.

Travolta sprang to fame as hunky high school wiseguy Vinnie Barbarino in the 1970s hit television comedy “Welcome Back, Kotter.”

He leaped to the big screen in the 1977 blockbuster hit “Saturday Night Fever,” earning an Oscar nomination for his role as the working-class disco-dancing hero Tony Manero, and starred the following year as Olivia Newton-John’s heartthrob, Danny Zuko, in the 1950s musical “Grease.”

Travolta earned a second Oscar nomination for his role as a hit man in 1994’s “Pulp Fiction.”