Excuse me, I must now go relieve myself.

If any of you who watched American Idol season five and wondered why this season we saw Elliott Yamin, Kellie Pickler, and Chris Daughtry perform, yet no runner up Katharine McPhee, you and Katharine would be in the same boat. She herself has no idea why she was never invited back.

US Weekly says:

Scores of American Idol alums turned out to partake in this year’s season finale, but noticeably absent from the festivities was last year’s runner-up, Katharine McPhee.

Although fellow Season 5 competitors Elliot Yamin, Kellie Pickler, Taylor Hicks and Chris Daughtry all returned for guest spots this season, McPhee, 23, was missing from the rundown – and it was not by choice.

“Katharine called them herself, trying to get on the [finale],” a source close to the singer tells Us. “She’s really hurt.”

But she wasn’t the only former Idol who got dissed. When Sony/BMG president Clive Davis addressed the TV audience, he made sure to plug Taylor Hicks’ new single, but failed to mention Kelly Clarkson’s latest single or her forthcoming CD, My December, over which the two have reportedly butted heads.

McPhee’s rep could not be reached, and Fox had no comment.

I really don’t understand why she was never invited back. Don’t they make money when Katharine and RCA make money? Wouldn’t they have a vested interest in one of their most promising talents selling more records, or having a hit single? It doesn’t make sense to me. Anyone care to explain?

Christina is looking beautiful out with her husband, sister-in-law, and niece on Memorial Day. That’s right girl, show Britney how to hold a damn baby.

Lindsay Lohan’s newest dark thriller in which she plays a stripper, called I Know Who Killed Me is getting a lot of buzz. The plot outline is:

The script revolves around Aubrey Fleming (Lohan), a young woman who is rescued after being abducted and tortured by a serial killer. When Fleming returns home, she claims to be someone else, raising questions as to whether she is suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder or if something more sinister is going on.

More stills from the movie:

There are clips from the movie up on the official website. The film opens on July 27.

Here’s the trailer:

I don’t know how many of you watched last night as Jordin Sparks was crowned the 6th winner of American Idol, but surely a lot less of you were watching than last year.

According to Reuters:

At least 29.5 million “American Idol” fans watched the finale of the hit talent show as 17-year-old Jordin Sparks was crowned the youngest winner yet in the program’s history, preliminary numbers showed on Thursday.

The tally for Wednesday night’s show was nearly 7 million fewer than the number of viewers who saw gray-haired soul crooner Taylor Hicks win the Fox network’s prime-time amateur singing contest last year, Nielsen Media Research said.

In addition to 7 million less people tuning into the results show, 10 million less people tuned into this year’s performance show from Tuesday night, as did those that tuned into see Taylor Hicks battle it out with Katharine McPhee last year.

This show really needs to make sure it gets good contestants next year, because this year they sucked…badly. Even the best singers weren’t that great. I was so bored I stopped watching a few weeks in. I couldn’t even bring myself to do the Idol Watch column I did last year. What a mess.

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Here’s Jordin’s final performance from Tuesday night:

The Rock is no Sean Penn, but I have a soft spot for him. He’s sexy and charismatic, and I generally enjoy him in his movies–even if the movies themselves aren’t that great. And who can forget his hilarious portrayal of a gay man in Be Cool?

Extra followed Katharine McPhee for her sexy photoshoot in an upcoming issue of Vegas magazine (yeah, I’ve never heard of it either), where she showed off those legs that own half the industry.

I swear to God, this woman is working overtime to convert every single gay man in existence. Just when you think she can’t get any hotter, she does. That bitch.

Her second single Love Story is going for adds on radio very soon, and will hopefully be the hit her album needs to get her to platinum status. Please own Taylor Hicks so I can laugh my ass off. I love pointing my finger and laughing at people under the age of 30 with gray hair.

By far the worst Rosie and Elisabeth fight this season. The best part was when they went to split screen. Classic!

Jeremy Piven owns all these raggedy ass looking motherfuckers.

These are promotional posters for Dane Cook’s upcoming movie with Jessica Alba, Good Luck Chuck. Some people find him sexy. Some people find him funny. I just find him fug and annoying.